Of cars and credit

On the last trip to my parents when I started the car to come home the check engine light came on.  It had rained a lot the day before we left, and it was still damp.  It was a long drive home, worrying about what to do.  The car is a 2002, so it's not new or something.  It's got some rust and will need new tires before winter, the heat wasn't working that great by February but we managed, I'm not sure it would last another winter without sinking a lot of money into it.  So the check engine light was a bit of a worry.  It went off a couple days later, and came back on the next time it rained.  To go off again when it got hot and dry again.  It's possible that it's something easy to fix, I'm just so tired of dealing with it. 

So I finally called a car company, they sell a couple different makes, and I've settled on the car I want.  I go in tomorrow to discuss details and test drive a couple models.  I hope it all goes well.  I am not looking forward to the expense, but am looking forward to the new car. I don't feel that my current car is safe to get back and forth to my parents.  And I know I can make the payments, though it may mean putting off a house for an extra year, possibly baby 2 as well, which is somewhat on hold any way.  It seems that having a nice permanent government job is all I really need to get a car loan... how crazy is that?  I believe having the car loan will further improve my credit, and allow me to get a mortgage. 

And about my job, I'm moving to a new position Sept 11th.  I'm pretty sure I'm happy about it.  It is a good opportunity to learn something new.  It's still an acting position, so I'll continue with the higher pay, and once the process wraps up I'll be in the position permanently.  So it's good. 

Jackson has been TWO lately.  He certainly has a mind of his own and does not like to listen until you threaten to take away his bottle, or not buy him a new toy.  He loves his little cars.  I started a sticker chart, but it did not go well, I'm going to try again.  There are moments I am at a loss how to deal with him.  I don't want to lose my temper with him but boy does he push my buttons sometimes!  I know he's not doing it on purpose but it seems like it sometimes.  I am working on it, as much as I am working on him.  We do have some great moments together as well, and I look forward to and try to enjoy those as much as possible. 

I am faced with a small problem.  My poor Mea is sick, she has pretty bad arthritis, and I took her for tests on Friday.  That annoyed me, the tests will say if she is healthy enough for medication, but if she's not they aren't willing to give anything to make her feel better.  So she's suffering while I wait for the blood work to come back.  Any way.  I expect she does not have much longer with us.  And I have no idea how to explain to Jackson where she has gone without unduly upsetting him, or having him connect things badly. For instance I don't want to say she got sick and didn't get better, then every time he or I get sick he will worry about it.  I can't say I took her to the farm, then he'll never want to go to the farm, or he will want to go visit her.  I hope that she can go on medication, and that it will help her live her life again, but I know it won't last long, so it is a dilemma of how long will I do this for her?  Should I have let her go?  I thought she was about 11 but the last very said she's closer to 16... that upsets me.  I've had her 9 years, and she came to me scared of people and very timid.  So while she has had a great life with me, I feel bad for all she obviously went through before me.

So ends my Sunday rambling.  Car, hopefully a new one soon!. Child... he's awesome but wow is he getting his own personality!  And my poor Mea... sweet little kitty that I love.



My Mea