I have a cold

I am sure my work is going to end up hating me, every time I am slightly sick now I call in, and don't go to work.  Today I am home because I have a cold.  If I didn't have a baby, I'd probably have gone to work.  But then I would have had the weekend to recover and sleep lots, now I don't have that luxury.  And this weekend promises to be raining and boring, and we'll both probably end up a little bit cranky. 

Even while I was pregnant I called in sick more than I would have before, sometimes because of morning sickness, sometimes I was just too tired and feeling icky to get out of bed.  Now, the slightest illness has me calling in.  It didn't  used to be that way!  I was good about going in, I had sick leave built up.  I also thought if I didn't go in the place would fall apart without me.  Now I don't think that.  And if it does, well honestly they should have planned a little better if that's the case. 

It's kind of funny how having a child puts a new perspective on things, like leaving work at work so I can focus on being a mom while I'm at home.  I went to pick up some groceries today, because I needed some juice and chicken noodle soup (I'm sick after all!) and it was so strange to be there pushing a cart without a toddler in it.  Even while driving, I look back and see his empty car seat, it feels weird.  I feel slightly guilty for taking him to daycare today while I'm home, but I am home to get better (and am going to take another nap in a few minutes), and I have to pay for the day any way. 

I am not sure that moms in relationships, with fathers in the picture, would have it any easier.  From what I've seen, even when sick those moms are expected to take care of everyone.  That may not always be the case of course, but if that was me, I'd be more than resentful if he was all healthy and didn't take care of the baby so I could get better.  I think things like that are why I'm happy as a single mom.  I look at all the work and effort people have to put into their relationships after kids enter the picture, and I just can't see myself doing that. 

Don't get me wrong, I'm sick, but I don't feel sorry for myself, and I know we'll manage.  But I am really glad I have good sick leave and other benefits at work because I sure do use them now!