Constant Battles

It feels like we are in a constant battle zone at our home. Everything I ask him to do is a fight of "I don't want to" or "Later". But later never happens. I am sooooo tired of this. I cannot keep doing it, I just can't! I'm exhausted and don't see how this will ever get better. I've tried limiting activities, he yells at me, calls me names, it's another fight. Getting out of the house in the morning on time, getting to bed on time, basic things like having a bath. When something is planned, something else is more "fun" so he doesn't want to leave the house, he'd rather play with his friends online.

I've made a chart, he does certain basic things and he's allowed to use the xbox or the ipad. But he still doesn't do them. And he still does use those things. I am so tired it's so hard to fight him. Exhausting. Friday night I went to bed, he stayed up until almost 11. How does that work? not well really.

I need to be firmer, stand my ground. But it ends up as a yelling match. With crying. and words we don't mean. I try to stay calm, and firm, but it never works for long. Never lasts. I wish we'd never gotten the Xbox, never let him play online, never let him use his iPad for Youtube watching. It's too late, the genie is out of the bottle. Now he won't play with toys, but he's only 8! He needs a "hobby" outside of those video games, and watching people play those video games. Next weekend I have him signed up to try an obstacle course class, I know it will be a fight to get him to go to it. As with everything lately. Fight to get him to school, daycare, fight to get him to bed, to go to the store with me. Everything. It's so exhausting. What can I give up on? He already refuses to bathe regularly, refuses to brush his teeth properly twice a day, brush his hair. Heck I did laundry this week and apparently he only changed his under pants once! But I know nothing and he won't listen when I give him why he should or shouldn't do these things. I'm stupid, I don't understand. He promises he'll do it at some point.

I'm failing. He is going to be a spoiled adult. He will be the one who blames everyone else, is always right, doesn't compromise or listen to others, and I don't know how to fix this any more. He was such a good kid, now he's a defiant child who thinks he is older than he is. He should be a kid. But he thinks he knows everything, and I'm not sure how to convince him otherwise. It isn't like he will suddenly start to do chores around the house or take care of himself properly. I can't win. And the Xbox and iPad need to GO. Heck even my own computer needs to go, perhaps the TV too? At least when we are together.

Something has to change, can't keep going like this. I just can't.

We have snow, already. It's going to be a long winter cooped up in the house. He has gone to a friends for dinner. I'll go get him around 7. Two hours to figure something out. Figure out how to limit these things and get him to participate in the house. I hope.