The last summer hurrah

 Soon it will be back to school. We are hopeful it will go well, and I am really hoping kiddo stays and doesn't let his anxiety overwhelm him. I think he is looking forward to it to a certain extent, at least seeing his old friends and playing at lunch, doing sports as well. The summer weather has cooled, but it's still pretty nice. Yesterday we took the day and went back to the water park, it was a lot quieter than when we went at the start of summer. We had a lot of fun, went on quite a few slides, and he had a lot of fun doing certain ones over and over with little wait. My feet and calves are so sore today from all the walking and stairs. We also got a little sunburned. But it was a super fun day. 

Now we have a few more days, and then it's back to it! I have the first couple days off when he goes back, so I'll be taking him to school those days. I also have some errands to run, and cleaning to do. His room will get a deep clean, he has been keeping it a bit tidy but things get messier over time and it seems to be where water bottles to go to get lost. I look forward to getting things clean and sorted, his room and the main living space. I need to make room for a cat wheel. When we got Olaf, our new bengal, and with our other cats, a cat wheel seemed like a good investment. Hopefully it'll fit in here somewhere. I may have to get rid of a few more things, I had planned to sell some of the toy storage so just need to actually try and do that. 

I think we will move in the spring, depending on how winter goes. Over the winter I will probably try and replace a few things, get rid of others. I'll need to keep distracted from the fact I probably won't be able travel for awhile still. This whole mixed vaccine thing is just making me upset. No one even bothers to make it look like they are doing anything to help. I am worrying about our March break cruises, and if we can't do them then I don't know what we'll be able to do instead, because I really must get away this winter. We will both be vaccinated and I just can't imagine we won't be able to finally travel. Even at the water park yesterday he was saying how much he can't wait to travel again. We miss cruising. I have a lot of vacation banked to use, just need to be able to travel!

Work has been busy, I covered for my boss for a couple weeks, that was too much. I have no desire to be a manager. At all. Now it's back to it, as people wind down their holidays and we move into a busy fall. One team member is leaving so it's the time to shuffle things and Lean the process. I am very excited, and know my manager is behind me. The changes are small but with a big impact. I do love Lean and getting rid of unnecessary steps. I feel like I'll finally be able to get this work into shape so anyone can step in and do the job. For now I am not looking to change positions. They are still allowing us to work from home, and I hope that I will be able to continue doing so forever. If the current boss has a problem with it, I will likely look for something else that will allow it. 

Visiting the doctor

 Summer is well underway, we've had HOT temperatures and then a few colder days, and now back to the heat. This week is vacation for me, along with next week. Sadly it's been pretty crappy so far. Our plans got torpedoed by a strange bump on Jackson's cheek, near his ear/jawline, that gradually became a swollen cheek. It started Monday, Tuesday I called the family doctor but was told he couldn't get a phone appointment until Wednesday. I called Wednesday at 8 when they opened and got an appointment to talk to the nurse practitioner at 9:15, sent some pictures and waited. At 9:30 we talked to her, answered questions and they set up an appointment to see the doctor (not his, he is on vacation this week as well). Went at 5:15 for that, apparently by then he had spiked a fever which made them give me dirty looks, well gee, it's likely an infection which tend to come with fevers so maybe prescribe some antibiotics so we can get that started? Nope, sent us off to the children's hospital. 

We went home to let the dog out since I knew it would be a long time sitting there, and off we went. By the time we got there, and parked, and found the doors, it was 6:45. We stood in line to get triaged, which was well over 30 minutes, they gave him a dose of advil for the fever, and sent us to the waiting room. We found seats and then waited. And waited. At 10:30 they put us in a room to see the doctor. I guess there was only one working because it was about 1 AM before we saw him. He did what the other doctor did, until I asked him about the ultrasound we were supposed to be there to get, and he kind of went "oh, ok, since that's why you are here". Couldn't see anything. Gave us a prescription, tried to give him a dose of antibiotics there but Jackson was throwing up by that point so I just took it home. He threw up before we got into the emergency room, and again after the doctor checked him out. And again in the car on the way home. By then it was all anxiety and worry, the family doctor told him he might have to do a covid test and he was very worried about that. So far we haven't had cause to be tested, and he wasn't there either. 

All to say, it was 8 hours from arriving at the hospital to getting home after 2 AM. Very tired but also wired and unable to really sleep, and hungry since we didn't have dinner. This all meant we didn't go to the water park again as we'd planned, and our trip to Toronto next week was iffy, but he really wants to go so I didn't cancel it. Now we hope for nice weather and the antibiotics to work. The swelling is coming down, he no longer looks like half a chipmunk, but he is still having trouble eating because it "feels weird". 

I have to say, I was unimpressed with the whole thing, this visiting the doctor in the age of Covid is really irritating. I also feel bad, I should have taken him to the hospital on Monday or Tuesday when it started. But there is nothing there, no marks, no obvious injuries or infections. I guess we'll never really know what caused it but I have said maybe we need to focus a little more on tooth brushing than we have been, and get some mouth wash or something to help? I don't know. 

At least he's been good about the antibiotics, reminds me when it's time for his mid day dose. Today I had a very bad migraine and was very out of sorts. Tomorrow we have no real plans, will probably do some cleaning and reorganizing. Sunday we go to my parents to drop off the dog and then Monday morning we head to the Toronto Zoo, followed by some shopping, time at the hotel (hope we can go swimming) and Tuesday to Wonderland. Which I hope goes well and the weather cooperates. Wednesday we go back to my parents to get the dog and come home. If he's feeling better we'll see about the water park on Thursday or Friday. I don't really want to go on a weekend if we can avoid it. And this is it for summer holidays, I didn't take a month off like I used to. 

I am really looking forward to the time away, even if we have to wear masks and I have to drive in Toronto. It has been a long time, we went there for one night last year but even less was open. I can't wait to be able to travel again. Though I have mixed dose vaccines so am not even sure when I'll be allowed to. Jackson will get his vaccines in December at the latest (depends when they approve for 5 to 11 year olds) and be all set. We have a Disney trip booked that I will cancel at some point, and cruises for March break, which may not happen. I may just book Disney for that time in case we can't cruise because of my vaccines. I am hopeful everything will be sorted by then. What is the point of getting vaccinated if life doesn't open up at least a bit? At some point we have to learn to live with this new disease. But I will get him vaccinated before we do anything too crazy. 

Summer

 The weather has been interesting so far this summer, between the crazy hot days and then cooler rainy ones. It's all over the place, but generally hot. I am glad the AC got fixed! So far we haven't done a whole lot, things are just reopening, with Ontario moving to phase 3 soon. We went to the waterpark yesterday and had a lot of fun, even though it was a mess. There was a problem with the pH and so slides weren't open. We did most of what we wanted to do, and had fun, I really do enjoy the lazy river, and he loves the wave pool. Those we were able to do a lot. It was nice to be "normal" but also strange because no one was social distancing, so I feel like we can't go anywhere or do anything for at least a week to make sure we didn't catch anything.

We have plans to go to Toronto for a couple nights in early August, we'll go to the Zoo for a day, then stay in a hotel near Wonderland for two nights, spending one full day there. I splurged on Fastlane, and also the meal and drinks for the day. So most everything is paid for, for that day at least. I will have to still pay for food at the zoo, and get parking there, but those tickets are bought already as well. It should be fairly open by the time we go. I believe the hotel we're staying at has a free breakfast, though I don't expect it to be much. It will just be nice to do something!

I changed all my cruises and trips around. With all the questions regarding vaccinated/not vaccinated I wasn't sure by December we'd be ok with the changes so I moved the RCL to March break and added a short 4 night cruise to that, and the Carnival to Dec 2023. So we have 6 cruises planned to the end of 2023. Plus a week at Disney, or a little more than a week I guess. I am still not sure on that, I have it booked/planned for December but I am worried about weather, and timing, and wonder if I should move it, but where to put it that won't be too close to the other vacations we have planned. In any case, we are eager to get travelling again and look forward to things getting more back to normal. Without me having to go back to work in the office of course. 

I had one week off this summer so far, and two more coming up in August. I didn't take much time off last year, but wanted a bit of a break this year. I look forward to sleeping in, probably going back to the water park, and the Toronto trip, even though I hate driving there and am scared of the rides at Wonderland. It will be a fun time. Life it ticking back towards normal, with some things that will probably stay in this new normal zone. I am thankful to be vaccinated, and hope that the rest of the world will be able to follow. I am super proud of Canadians for getting their doses in such high numbers, and while we had a rough start to the roll out it really seems to be picking up. 

Vaccinated.

 Today I got my second dose of vaccine. Because this is Canada it took over 8 weeks, and is different from my first dose. But it's done. Two weeks and I'll be "safe". Not that kiddo will be, sadly Ontario is giving me a hard time about getting him done until his birthday. If we lived in a different province he'd already have his first dose. Frustrating. We'll figure something out eventually I guess, but I do feel like I need to start planning for a backup vacation in December, or how to cancel what's booked, or part of what's booked. Any way, we'll see how that goes.

We have a few things planned for summer, the local water park is open by reservation so I booked it for the first Saturday it's open. We also booked a day at Canada's Wonderland near Toronto, and hopefully we'll go to the zoo as well. So much driving that will bug me but we'll manage. It'll be nice to have a vacation of sorts. 

Friday was the last day of the school year. All his friends who stuck with the school got t-shirts, pictures and a diploma. I'm a little sad his name won't be on the wall, he won't have those memories, but I also think he did better this year than if he'd been in classes. He learned a lot. I am a little worried that he will have a hard time in Grade 7, and it won't last. I am also worried that they will try and make me go back to the office, and I don't want to, at all. I quite like working from home and hope I can manage to remain doing so. I'd like to go pick up my stuff from work, it's all still there, but other than an occasional meeting, I want to be at home. 

I still have a lot of sorting to do here, lots of cleaning and reorganizing, but I do feel like it's on track. I also still have an urge to move. But I have stronger urges to travel. It's a strange dilemma, which one do I focus on. At least the AC has been fixed, I did a few things to fix things up. But there is still work to do, and frustrating critters in the garage. The AC was broken during the heat wave, they came to fix it a week later, we survived, went to the beach a lot actually. And had a mattress in the living room for Jackson to sleep on, apparently I snore too loudly to be able to stay with him. 

Todays dose seems to have made me sleepy, so I think I will be going to bed early tonight, will need to put little Olaf to bed early. He is adorable, and plays well with the dog. The other cats aren't keen on him but I think they will be eventually. Or he'll stick with the dog. Either way, he's cute, playful and healthy. And he sleeps in the guest room because he is a pain when it's sleep time. 

A May Vaca

 I am done work for almost two weeks! I don't have to go back until May 25th and it is so nice. Not like we can go anywhere or travel, but it sure does feel nice to not have to get up early or anything. My plans for the time off are to clean, declutter, garden and have naps :-)  Since I had planned to move, I ordered boxes and they were delivered early, so I wasn't able to cancel the order. I have to find a place to store them until we do decide to really move. I also need to get rid of so much from the basement, there are toys and all kinds of things that need to GO. I have been waiting for places to be open that will pick up donations but that seems to be a long wait. Maybe by summer. In any case, I'll put everything in the garage for now. Also have some broken electronics to go, but that is a process, can't just put stuff out at the garbage sadly. I'll need to find a place to drop it all off. Someday. 

I'm glad of the news that kids 12 - 15 can get Pfizer, can't wait for them to get to his age here. Hopefully by June but we'll see. I hope they don't only do it through the schools since he isn't registered. This will mean we should be able to travel this winter! Cruising will happen. We have two weeks booked, flights booked, hotels before and between the two cruises. Should be great. Can't wait. Looks like things are getting better on the cruise front too, masks won't be required if you are vaccinated (which we will be). I'll still do cruise sponsored excursions though. Not sure about the one we have planned for Jan/Feb, might cancel that one. I also have one booked for Aug 2022 to Bermuda! It's from New York and we'll go a few days early to see some of the city. Which scares me but I look forward to it as well. I just can't wait to travel! I had been considering going from Greece or Italy, but the long flights and expenses are higher make it less likely.

Sadly we are still in lock down so can't go visit my parents or anything fun like that. Hopefully by June we will be able to though. And by our week off in July for sure. At that point we may decide to do something more fun. I am still hoping the waterparks will be open. Even if only half the summer. I alternate between being hopeful this is all coming to an end and wondering if we'll ever be able to get back to normal. I am planning for the future though, someday we'll be able to do more. 

Vaccine one done

 On Sunday the province announced that they were lowering the age to 40+ on the astrazeneca vaccine available in pharmacies. I was super excited to hear this and signed up for all the places and wait lists. Yesterday I got an email from one of the pharmacies that they have "walk in" places so I called to see if they had any available, they made me an appointment for today and I got the shot at 12:45. I am so happy. There is a 16 week wait for shot two but I don't care, just relieved. It was interesting to see so many other people there excited to be getting vaccinated. Interesting too, as soon as they lowered the age, the appointments booked up fast. I think many people in the 55+ were waiting for a "better" shot which honestly irritates me, even if it led to me getting mine sooner. 

Now who knows how long it will be for Jackson to get his. If he was already 12 I'd be less worried about that. I do hope it happens this year. It will impact our plans for December. I am hoping we can cruise but if not, we'll spend two weeks in Orlando and do Disney/Universal or something. Easy. We will travel!!

I hope I don't have a bad reaction to the vaccine, I already feel a bit tired, had a nap after work, and my head/jaw hurts but that happens to me a lot since I grind my teeth and clench my jaw all the time. I will try and wait it out, see what happens. I am ready to take the day off tomorrow if I have to, I have sick leave I can use. I do have a grocery order to pick up, which I can cancel now but would like to get. I am sure I'll be able to manage it any way, just have to drive there, they load the stuff in the trunk and I drive home, put everything away (that's the hard part lol). But I've managed more when sicker so I'm sure I can manage this. I guess that's when being a single mom and having to do it all pays off, I'm used to managing things no matter how I feel. 

On the move front, while I decided to move, I changed my mind and we'll be here for a little while still. I am going to use the time to really declutter and clean up (for reals this time). I want to be in a position that if we decide to move, we can do it quickly. I have some other financial goals, buying a house is not one of them though. I am still thinking of moving to a smaller town outside the city, but we'll see what happens with work from home, and Jackson's school in the fall. 

I am so happy to be vaccinated once, and cannot wait for number 2. Phew! 

To move or Not to move

 I was browsing the local sites and saw that the townhomes we have wanted to move to for ages have both gone up a bit in price and almost all been rented. I also noticed that the smaller places, with no garage or storage, are also almost all taken. In a panic I asked to see them, and ended up applying to rent one of the townhomes. It is really nice with great finishes, brand new, no yard maintenance, smaller driveway I'll have to shovel, and a good size for us. But expensive. Now I am in panic mode the other way, thinking I shouldn't have done it and we should just stay here. I cannot make a decision. I've made lists of pros and cons, they are about equal either way. The difference is money (which leads to trips, eating out, etc) versus quality and "niceness". Which is more important. Surely the money makes the most sense. I know I will never buy a home, it really isn't on my radar as an option unless I win the lottery, dealing with maintenance and all of that is of no interest to me. It's a heart vs head question at this point. What my heart wants is the new place, but my head says to stay here and deal with all the issues. I have tomorrow to decide, and the decision has to be made before end of work day. 

Covid restrictions are not helping matters, they add to my stress if we do move. The current landlord will want to show the place, and I'm not sure how comfortable I am with other people coming in to see it. Plus movers, because I am not moving things myself. How does that work? I assume they have to mask and distance, but what does that mean for me being here while it's happening? Do I just wait at the new place for them to arrive with everything? Sit in my car and wait for them to finish loading everything in the truck? I'd take the dog and child to my parents. Hopefully that will be allowed by then. Since we are in full lock down until May 20th, so I can't even donate stuff now. 

We have been here 8 years, which is a long time for me. Jackson was 3 when we moved in, so we have toys and stuff from that age right up to now. Including a bit of broken electronics you can't just put in the trash. I have to go through all of it. Should be working on that now. It's overwhelming a bit. I did clean up the upstairs, 75% of it any way, and it's "ready to pack". The only things left in those spaces just need to be put in boxes, which I already have. But we have 6 weeks so we need to use some of that stuff still. I will get more done today, I need to get the garbage collected from a few areas, including stuff hidden at the back of the freezer that is no good any more. Garbage can only go out every 2 weeks, which means 3 times until we move. And I don't want food garbage sitting around getting stinky for weeks at a time. 

But if we stay, I can take my time with all of that. It still needs to be done, decluttering, cleaning, but not within 6 weeks. I wish I had more time. Ideally I wouldn't be going until August, or September. Give me a few more months to get things really organized, and save a bit more. Replace some furniture. But the clock is ticking and time is up. So it's now or never. I don't want it to be never. Even if it means we can't order in 3 times a week or travel once or twice a year, if we have to limit that to ordering in once a week and travelling every two years. It's possible. I know some of my angst is because of how well my son pushes my buttons. When he wants something and has already spent his allowance he will call me poor and stupid. And it hurts. Because we are not poor, though we don't have a lot of savings, we live a comfortable life, and he doesn't see that because he always gets what he wants. And it is hard to say no and stay strong in the constant badgering and bargaining, and just general belligerence. And so I second guess every decision I have made, and my choices. Obviously I have work to do on myself. And I will talk to my therapist tomorrow about it, I am so thankful I have her now.