It's a Christmas Lockdown

 Our premier announced that starting on Boxing Day we'll be back in lock down for 4 weeks. I do get it, and I have commented that I hope we follow Quebec because so many of them would just come here if we didn't. But oh, it's hard to go back! I mean it doesn't impact me too much I guess, but there will be limitations on some things, even going to the pet store to get the dog's food becomes more difficult. I plan to go to the grocery store tomorrow and get what I need for a few weeks, and we'll see from there. I mean grocery stores will still be open of course, but I'd prefer not to go and stand in line again, especially given it's winter now and cold! We were expecting to have a just us Christmas, which is perhaps why I am so keen to have another child. It feels lonely and like we need more. 

The doctor's office is closed for two weeks, I hope they will do online or telephone appointments when the two weeks are over, I need a new referral for Jackson to a psychologist. I am tired of broken things. He gets so angry and just breaks things, expensive things. He's now without a computer for at least a few weeks. He had broken the screen but got a monitor for his birthday and broke that. So yeah. It's super fun times here. At least Christmas is soon and hopefully some of his gifts will help to fill his time a bit. And this stuff is all why I wonder if having another child would be a something I can handle. He is sometimes more than I can manage. We are given what we can manage but it is hard to manage sometimes. Maybe I need to talk to the therapist too. 

Working on getting his sleep back to normal, he had one good day/night and then last night not so much. I think he was still upset about the broken monitor, but hopefully he will be able to get to sleep tonight eventually. I do hope he comes down to do more than watch youtube on his phone. We had one good day and an ok evening yesterday. After the broken monitor that is. I wonder if a few weeks of no games will make a difference. I doubt it. He still isn't learning how to deal with the anger. I tell him he can get mad but he can't break things or hurt people (including himself). We've tried a lot of things but nothing seems to stick, and he feels it's all "stupid". I don't even know if talking to someone else would even be helpful. If he will even talk to them. He asked the other day if he could just take medication, so we'll discuss that with the doctor as well. I don't know if it will help. Sometimes I wonder if anything will help. But I know he can't go on like this forever, he will have no friends, no one will want to be near him. So something needs to be done.