New year's eve. It feels good that this year is ending. I wish it had gone better. This COVID, lockdown stuff has been difficult. But I am trying to see the good things in it. I have really enjoyed working from home. I will continue with that for as long as possible, if I never have to go back to an office I will be ok with that. Though I'd like to go get my stuff from my desk, I had a really nice pair of boots I left as well as some baby pictures of kiddo, some of his artwork and a fancy travel mug I used for coffee/tea while I was there. Not much else really but still, I'd like to get that stuff. Eventually.
My goals for this year have been interesting to try and keep. Yelling less, I think I have? I have certainly learned to listen to him more and let him have a bit more freedom in his own schedule. We haven't had regular games nights or anything but we do spend some time together and he is finally putting himself to sleep, though having a hard time getting to bed at night. We will work on that in the new year.
Losing weight, I did lose some over the early summer, it was hard and took a lot of exercise. And when I gave up again it all came back. Of course. My goal for the new year will be to eat keto/low carb and get 2500 steps on the days I work, as well as 10 minutes or more of walking each day. The goal is not the weight loss but to feel better. For my stomach to not be so unhappy, to have more energy. Hopefully, weight loss will come but it isn't the goal.
The decluttering I did last December has remained, things have moved a bit and the kitchen remains a sore spot, honestly the layout is not the best for us. But the rest of the space on the main floor is good. I haven't done nearly enough to the rest of the house, but I need to now if we will be moving. I do not want to move all this stuff if we don't need to! So stuff needs to go. Sadly donation is difficult with covid around, so I'll have to figure that out and perhaps in a month or two things can be picked up again?
Certainly, a lot changed in 2020, but not as much as I expected I guess. Jackson isn't in daycare, or school for that matter. My new job did not turn out as well as I had hoped but it's a job and I will continue working to make it better for me. If it doesn't improve though, since I've been there almost a year, I will look for something else. We haven't moved, but I still hope to. By the time we move, I will decide where and to which place. I hope by March 30 to get my back pay so will have enough for first/last, moving expenses and new stuff for the new place. I plan a two month No Buy challenge again, this time we'll stick to it. Nothing other than groceries, pet food and gas for the car, which I don't need a lot of. Jackson will get his allowance but it is all he will have to spend. I hope this will help us save even more for moving, and get Jackson a gaming computer. Though to earn that he has to actually speak to the therapist and the possibility of medication is there as well.
For 2021, besides my goals for eating and moving my body, and my home, I haven't got much else. I want to focus on my health and my home. Jackson has said he wants to try therapy and perhaps medication for his ADHD so he won't have anger issues. I have an appointment on the 4th to talk to his family doctor and hopefully therapy will follow soon after. I will also bring up medication and see what the doctor's thoughts are on that. For school, I will leave that up to kiddo, if he'd like to continue homeschooling I am ok with that, or if he wants to go to school I will be ok with that as well. We do have a trip planned for December 2021, hopefully we will be vaccinated by then, and I will be ok with him missing two weeks of school for it. If they aren't, well I'm not sure it matters to me. I am quite disillusioned with public school to be honest, I blame them for a lot of Jackson's problems.
I still feel the two bedroom townhome is the best choice for us, but the three bedroom would be nice. It costs more and I would worry things could be hard financially. It all costs more than here of course, but I am anxious to move. A lot of the problems here I am sure the landlord would solve if I brought it up with him, and some he will have to fix for a new tenant any way (the back deck which is rotting for example). But the space is also not the best for us. The kitchen in particular is not the best for cooking, which is part of why I don't like to cook. It may be silly but I think if we had a nice kitchen with a big island I would be more inclined to actually cook. And cooking would be better for our health. We have been watching some TV together and keep seeing the commercials for meal delivery kits and he asks why we don't get them any more. The short answer is both they are expensive and he has never eaten the actual meals from them. I always have to cook the food differently for him than the recipe calls for. He said he would try meat with sauce on it next time. But I do think we'll wait until we move to try them again. So hopefully April or May.
Now tonight, steak, broccoli and spaghetti for supper. And tomorrow I cut carbs, again, and stick with it this time. Tomorrow I start walking again, inside or out, 10 minutes a day to start. Tonight we will watch something on TV or a movie and eat chips and chocolate and candy. Tomorrow, I will start cleaning in the basement and the guest room. I have to take down the Christmas tree, but am reluctant to do so, it is so pretty and I don't want to put it away. I am so glad we got a new tree, it is smaller but fits nicely and looks so nice. It will be so empty without it, and all the other stuff. I guess it's like that every year. This year seems different though. We had no family get together, it's been a week since Christmas and it feels strange. Time is always a bit of a blur this time of year, and this year is worse than ever. The whole year has been a blur. Hopefully 2021 will be better. Sometime by April vaccinations should be available for us (or me at least I guess) and this coming summer we will hopefully be able to do more than last year, perhaps go back to the zoo, maybe get to go to Calypso again, and just be happy.
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