Winter, winter... go away!!

It seems another snow storm is on the way.  There are supposed to be up to 20 cm falling starting tonight, and I am not happy.  Because my garage is full of stuff, I can't park in there so will have to clean the car off in the morning, and if I'm home when the drive way is cleared it'll be not done very well.  So I'm not happy. I want spring!!  I want warm weather and the snow to go away. I want to plant a garden, I want to go for walks, re-learn to ride a bike, get Jackson out on his bike.  I am so done with winter.

The move has been expensive, and I need to really buckle down or things are not going to go well.  The new place is costing more than the old one did, plus I have two places to pay utilities for this month. I also still owe my parents money, and my credit card is maxed out.  Stupid really, I know better.  I just can't say no to my kid, that would be the biggest part, I spend more on the boy and his toys than I should.  I am so not the parent I had planned to be. I was going to be one of those funky green mama's with wooden toys and a kid who had to learn to make believe without anything mechanical or electrical.  Now I'm the mom whose kid has pretty much every Mighty Machines movie, 100+ Hot Wheels cars, and gets a new something every time we go to Walmart.  It's terrible and so not what I had planned.  I hope that I can change it, but I have my doubts. 

Yesterday was a normal Sunday for us, nice breakfast, quick trip to the pet food store to pick up cat & dog food.  Then play time.  A couple friends came to see the new place, and gave me a nice house warming gift.  Then they left and I went in to the kitchen to make Jackson some scrambled eggs for dinner, I came back to find him asleep on the floor... child hasn't had a nap for me since December I think.  And there he was, passed out. 

Sleepy boy

If only he would fall asleep like that at bedtime.  He is just too busy, mind racing, the things he comes out with and says while he's supposed to be falling asleep.  He just wants to play and not stop.  He uses every excuse, has to pee, has to have a drink, needs something to eat, wants another toy.  It's very funny.  Very frustrating, and thank goodness for being able to tape shows! 

The potty training is going very well though, he has started to do all his business on there, and even stops to go pee when he has to. We have had one over night accident, not bad for about a month of no bottles!  And part of it is he wants to make me happy.  He knows I like it when he pees on the potty, and of course he wants to make me happy.  He also likes to show me when he has done his other business in there, which I much prefer to having to clean underpants or pjs. 

Being a mom is the most amazing thing. Sometimes I think I'm good at it, sometimes it's a real trial.  I know I make mistakes, I know there are some issues with our diet, not eating well enough, not getting out enough.  But I think my little boy loves me, and I know that I love him very much.  I am working on being a better mom, and hope that I can improve as life goes on.  I think my next step is to really make better choices for myself, to live a healthier way.

I think I am going to need more patience this summer, I plan to have a garden and I know Jackson will want to help with it, he always wants to help, take the garbage out, clean the house, do the dishes.  He is my little helper and he enjoys it, so I need to take advantage of that and make sure not to squash it even though doing it myself would be a lot easier.  Stepping back and letting him do it, help or try will be a key thing this summer.  Hopefully my patience holds out.