Jackson turns 11

 It's my baby's birthday. Today, as when he was born, it's snowing. Unlike the past few years, we haven't been able to have a big party. We did facetime my parents while he opened presents, so that was nice. And we will order in our usual dinner. Normally we'd go there but that isn't really a smart choice. I have ice cream for his special dessert, with sprinkles and a candle. He isn't big on cake so this works. I did buy some mini cupcakes he likes but I think he will enjoy the ice cream more. 

The dog goes to the groomers this afternoon as well, he needs a haircut. Then I'll pick him up later when he's all dry and smells good again. And this morning I went to the big W and spent way too much money, but think I am finally done shopping! I wrapped all the presents when I got home, realized I ordered the wrong Monopoly game, should have checked the packages better when things arrived, but did find the proper one on amazon and will get it Monday. So phew... and we'll keep the other version for a gift for someone if birthday parties ever become a thing again. I took the day off and it was nice. I can't wait to be off for two weeks over the holidays.

We were supposed to be on a cruise ship this week, today we'd be in Grand Cayman and going to the steakhouse for dinner. Maybe next year. Now that one vaccine is approved, I am sure others will follow. I know I'm not at the top of the list to get one, and kids aren't even on the list yet, but hopefully by next fall we'll be able to get them and then be able to travel again. I miss travelling! 

We've been talking a lot about moving. I am hoping by May, but earlier would be better. It depends on what "spring" means in terms of my back pay. March? or later? Who knows, but we'll be getting ready any way. The main floor is still looking good after the decluttering last year, a few hot spots pop up, I have a hard time keeping the kitchen neat, it's just so little counter space, so little storage. But the rest is good. I will work in the basement over the holidays, I plan to spend a couple days, or part of days at least, down there getting as much as possible out of the house. And I have lists of things we want to buy or replace before, or shortly after, we move. I think we'll be staying in Barrhaven, where exactly remains to be seen still. And perhaps it is silly to move, but I want a change I guess. I hope to buy a few of the items I want to replace over the next few months. At least the raises are set to come before the new year, so my pay will go up, thank goodness. 

I wonder sometimes, if I should move ahead with baby 2 plans. My body is against it, but my heart yearns for it. With 11, and more likely 12 years between kids, is it foolish? I mean another 7 years and Jackson is 18, then I could be alone again. But is that what I want? Jackson wants a brother who is only a few years younger than he is. Adoption would be that route, but adoption comes with it's own hurdles, and difficulties. And I worry I wouldn't pass whatever tests they set. Plus I'd have to rely on other people to provide references and such. It's so frustrating a process. But I won't be happy without trying something. Adoption is less expensive, but less sure. 

So I go on with my plans. Though keto fell in the face of my mom's cherry loaf. I am getting back to it, and will continue to try and follow it through the new year, January and February for sure. No more junk food or carbs for me. I will be ready and able to do it. And the cherry loaf is gone so that helps. The decluttering continues, and will escalate shortly. 

Jackson has quite the set up now for his computer, except that his laptop is not powerful enough to be a true gaming system. I did promise him a gaming system once I get my back pay, in the spring. He has everything else he needs for it now though, fancy microphone, webcam, good monitor, gaming keyboard and mouse. I'll get him a good system in the spring, and a bigger desk once we move. If we move. We should move. 

November Ending

 This year is going very fast, and very slow at the same time. I think most people are feeling the same thing. At least it is the Holiday season. Christmas is coming up soon, I'm not at all ready, but I have started at least. I have an idea of what to get everyone who needs to be bought for. Time just seems to be moving fast, Jackson is growing up a lot. Work is the same, day by day. I wish I had more time off but I am trying to save most of it for when things are back to normal and we can travel. I will have two weeks off over Christmas at least, and a day off on Jackson's birthday. My parents are dropping off gifts next week, so I need to wrap what I got for them, and hope it's enough. It's not much this year, shopping was tricky as I didn't want to go out much to do it. I need to get a few more things for Jackson, his birthday is covered but I feel like I haven't gotten him enough for Christmas yet. I'll work on that after his birthday. A lot of smaller things this year, no one big gift. I know he wants a gaming PC but there is no way I'm spending that much on one thing this year! I promised him one when I get my back pay in May-ish. When we will also hopefully be moving. 

Everything feels very stuck, stuck in waiting mode. I am waiting for this or that before moving forward. It's hard, hard because of covid, and not being able to see family or friends, but also hard because I want so many things and I feel like I have wasted so much time already. I've been trying to do what I can, the Christmas ornaments are mostly sorted and some are gone. I need to work on the basement more, it's become a dumping ground for stuff. Yet I also worry about getting rid of all the baby stuff when I want another one. But I can always replace things I guess. I don't want to pay to move things we don't need. Starting in January we'll be saving more money, which will be hardest on kiddo, he is not used to being denied. He's already pushing me for things he wants and I say it's too close to his birthday/Christmas and we don't have extra money for that now, he gets very mad. His allowance is never enough. 

I've been eating keto for almost a week now. I feel good about it. My stomach is a lot happier after the first day or so. Keeping it up will be tricky for the next week or so, I plan to cheat on Christmas for dinner, maybe. After that it should be smoother sailing. At least I hope so! While I hope it will let me lose some weight, it is also so I feel better, which I normally do when I stick to it. I just have to stick to it. 

I have no trips planned for 2021. Obviously we don't know when vaccines or anything will be happening so I haven't got any travel plans. We have a cruise booked for 2022, which has been changed apparently, without notifying me. I am not sure how I feel about the new changes, the ship and itinerary have changed, even the dates. We'll see. Perhaps they will offer something eventually. And if I were to decide to do something about having another baby I may not be able to go any way. We also have a cruise booked for 2023, and those I am really looking forward to. With a baby or not. 

I still want to hold a baby in my arms, even if it means being pregnant and giving birth, and being broke for ages. Jackson said he doesn't want a baby brother (he insists it will be a boy no matter what) who is that much younger than him, but he also kind of wants a brother. He's be happier if we adopt, but I'm not sure I can go through all of that. Though it might cost less, it is so much extra work and invasive. Plus, I wouldn't get a baby. Though given my health and reproductive status I'm not sure a baby is possible any way. Whether I can afford it or not. In any case, my priorities now are staying keto, decluttering the house, and moving. 

Why move though? Our place is decent, I am sure the landlord would fix the things that are problems if needed. I just don't care of having yard work, and shoveling, and would like a change, new start. Perhaps a place that's a bit more updated, easier to clean, with new schools to choose from. Should he go back to school. Close enough to work that I can go if I have to. Though I do hope I'll be able to continue working from home indefinitely. The places I am looking at are probably smaller than this place, two people don't need so much space. Even if I have a baby, there should be a way to do that. Some of them have 3 bedrooms, similar to this place but a different, more open, layout, and better finishes. Perhaps no finished basement, but I don't think that will be a problem. They probably all cost more than here though. But not by much. 

Jackson needs better friends. The only kids he is still in touch with, he plays on line with and one of them is just not a nice kid. The other one is ok except for the influence of the other. And the boy who lived down the street, moved. Far. It's harder since he's not going to school. But he always had difficulties with friends. I am hoping we'll be able to figure something out if we move, perhaps he will meet other kids, even if I put him in school for a year or whatever, so he can make friends. I'll figure it out. I know if we stay here and he goes to the high school with all those kids, he'll never branch out to the other kids. And he needs better friends. 

November is almost done for another year. One more month to go! Then finally 2020 is over. Apparently the vaccines should be available and distributed by September next year. I will remain hopeful that it actually happens like that. Perhaps I'd plan a last minute trip for Disney or something. Or get pregnant. Who knows! 

Happy Thanksgiving 2020

 What a different year this is. Normally we'd head to my sister's for dinner, or possibly my parent's. But this year, we are home. And since a big ole turkey dinner is way too much for us, when Jackson doesn't really like any of it, we will have a chicken with some gravy and he can have pasta or rice with his. Should still be yummy, but different from regular years. We did go visit my parents on Friday, before restrictions here locked up again. Considering neither kiddo nor I have been out of the house much in the past few weeks, it did feel quite safe. We won't see my sister and her family though, they are spending a lot of time up at their cottage (well brother in law and niece any way, my sister doesn't go). I think that's actually against the new rules, but I'm not going to cause them a problem over it. Just keep our distance really. 

Halloween promises to be another strange holiday, I have promised to buy lots of candy and we'll just stay home. He hasn't really got any friends to go trick or treating with at this point any way. Which is strange and interesting. He has always felt like he'll never make friends, yet he has never really had any good ones. I have suggested we could move, perhaps to a smaller town just outside Ottawa, and have a lower cost of living, more space. And he'd make new friends, though that would require him going to school. Another thing to think on any way. As long as I am close enough to go in some days to the office, eventually. I will be pushing to work from home as much as possible. At least until Jackson is a bit older, or back in school full time. I am looking at a few places, they are closer to my parents. But still rentals. And then I'm not sure if its "worth it" to move. Perhaps we should wait a bit longer, another year or whatever. Maybe someday I can buy a place, though to be honest, if I just wait until I'm retired, and he's moved out, I can get a smaller condo type place maybe? Or an RV and just drive south when it's cold. 

We watched all the Harry Potter movies, which he enjoyed. And have led to an increased desire to visit Universal Studios. Maybe in a year, or two. Probably a combo trip with our Favourite Disney. There are some new rides coming there and it is our happy place for sure. We already have two cruises booked for 2022 and 2023 so will have to fit it around those, and if we do more trips, we won't be moving any time soon! We still have to watch the Fantastic Beasts movies, but those should be coming out soon for us to watch. 

After Halloween it will be the count down to winter and Christmas. I have already told him there won't be a big birthday party this year, but that means I'll get him a proper gift instead of paying for an expensive party. We will go to my parent's to celebrate and maybe see Auntie and her family. When asked what he wants, he doesn't know besides a gaming computer. But apparently my dad may be upgrading his computer and then giving his to kiddo... that one does play the games he likes better and I think we could maybe upgrade the graphics card to help with lag as well. Then the laptop goes to my mom, or someone. 

At some point we should go for a walk in the woods to see the pretty fall colours. The weather has just been so rainy lately that I'm sure it's pure mud on all the trails. It would be nice to be out in the fresh air and enjoy some nature. The trails nearby are ok but not really nature trails at all. I am not sure Gatineau that is possible, Quebec's rates are as bad or worse than Ottawa so I don't really want to risk it. There are some trails near here, I'm not sure how busy they are, I imagine when the weather is nice they will be very busy though. 

Other than having to go for dog food next week, I should need much of anything grocery wise for at least a few weeks. That is nice, and hopefully means we won't have to head out to any stores. I'll need cat food too but that I get delivered as it's cheaper. Avoid going out much is key. Eventually things will improve again, I hope. Eventually, things will return to a more normal state, though I doubt they will ever be what they were. Some pieces of this lock down and isolation will probably continue, work from home would be great to keep going, but it would be nice to travel again. I can live with masks, if we have to, though they can be a pain at times. 

I've been reading some online, people who are all upset because of the lockdowns, and they raise some good points, that it is destroying people in poor areas, in other countries that have relied on tourism and not for profits. I see it, but I also see this disease that we know so little about, we don't know the long term impacts of people having this disease. Maybe the death rate isn't super high, but there are more and more people who are having serious long term impacts from it. People who recover, who don't have the virus any more, but are having issues with lungs, lethargy, blood clotting issues, so many health problems. And with things running rampant south of the border, I am all for keeping that closed until they get it together. The problem of course is we can't open travel to over seas without opening to the US, so we are stuck. Keep the 2 week isolation until things can be kept safer, until there is better tracking of contacts. 

I do know people who have had problems because of this lock down, because things were closed for so long. So many businesses that have closed. I am thankful that the government is at least doing something to help, that there are benefits being brought in to help people make a living wage. I hope these types of things continue, this is how Canada's universal health care started, this is how we need to continue. Yes, we pay a lot of taxes because of these things but it seems worth it to me. I don't have to worry that if I get sick, I will have a massive bill to pay because of it. When I had my gallbladder problems I didn't have to worry about my hospital stay or the surgery, it was all covered. Any way. All interesting stuff to think about. 

Winter season and holidays

Winter arrived, then went away a bit. It's cold but we had some rain so all the snow melted. Phew! I am not a cold and snow kind of person, which is strange I'm sure, since I live in Canada after all. Winter of course, means Jackson's birthday party and soon after that Christmas. Which means so much money to spend.

He wanted to see the new Star Wars for his party but they don't do parties over the holidays so we settled on Swimming. It was less expensive than some choices, and I was able to book the date/time that works. He's invited 6 friends, there is room for one more but he'd better decide soon if he wants to add someone. My sister makes the cake, star wars themed of course. I have to get some loot bags or something, and provide some snacks. More money to spend. This time of year is often a struggle with money, especially as Jackson has gotten older and wants less toys and more tech.

This year he wants a laptop, and a cellphone with a data plan. He hasn't decided what to ask Santa for. Yes he still believes. And he is also worried that he'll end up with coal since he's "bad". I am not entirely sure how to proceed, I don't think he is a bad kid, he has some problems of course but in general he does try so hard. And we have been doing a lot better lately as well. My parents gave him their old ipad, with a kid proof case, and so I at least get my lap top back. Though he still wants to use it to play his games. But for now, it is going to help.

I got him a weighted blanket, which I hope will help with sleep, and make life a bit easier in that regard. I had planned to get him a new Xbox controller but I think my parents are doing that to go with the new game they got him as well.

For me, my parents want to pay someone to help me declutter and clean the house. I admit, it gets overwhelming. I am terrible at house work and keeping things neat, I tend to keep some things far longer than I should. I did some work today, cleaning a few things out and ready to recycle on Tuesday. Everything still needs work though, and we need to make room for the tree soon. Probably for next weekend. Not as much to do this year as last for that though, just the recycling I packed up today and somewhere to put the exercise bike. Perhaps that will go down to the basement.

Given how terrible I seem to be at money and cleaning, my desire to expand my family is probably pretty stupid. How would I manage? I admit, the last house was easier to keep neater with the wood floors, much easier to clean. I miss my robot vacuum but it broke and isn't worth it to try and repair. The choppy layout here makes it hard to use that any way. Perhaps it would work in the new place when we get to move next year. At least I hope we get to move next year! I should have saved more I guess, but we have enjoyed travelling. Which we will be doing much less of going forward.

Work is still frustrating. I have an interview on Tuesday for a new position but I'm not sure I am interested. I will talk to the hiring manager and see what it's about and how flexible they are on a few things. Otherwise I will stay where I am through winter at least. I would enjoy what I do if people would actually do their jobs and I didn't feel like I am babysitting them all. Including my boss. If only I was bilingual, I could be the boss. I don't speak french and don't feel like I can learn it, even the language training they would send me on is a year and you can't take vacations or anything. That's hard with a young kid. He is almost 10 now, but still can't stay home alone for any length of time.

2019 is winding down, the year has been interesting. Summer was really good and our Disney trip was awesome. but I wonder if I should have saved that money and done something else with it instead. I got a new car, and it is so awesome. I have spent a lot of time stressed, and it is wearing on me. Jackson has struggled but we seem to be doing better and I hope that continues to improve. I hope that 2020 will be an amazing year and am trying to get us settled to a point where it should be smooth sailing.

Busy December

December is always a busy month. With Jackson's birthday and the holidays, it is also an expensive month. This year is no different. We are going on another cruise, his party was last weekend, and he has been invited to a few birthday parties. I'm also trying to get all the Christmas shopping done before we go, or at least know that what is still left I can pick up easily on my way home from work the few days I will be working in December.

Jackson's birthday party was a success. He got a lot of nerf guns, which is a little annoying to me but is what he told all his friends he wanted, and they came through for him. He went to another party last night, and had a lot of fun. There is one next weekend but we will be away so he'll be missing it. I guess this isn't the time of year to go on a trip! He's not missing much in school, and as a result of the trip and our Christmas holidays I only have to work 9 days in December. So for me, it works!

We do have another cruise, for Jackson's birthday. And I am very excited. He wishes we were going back to Walt Disney World. He'll get over it. I prefer to cruise, it is more relaxing to me, we get to see new places, and try new things. I also don't have to worry if he doesn't like what he wanted for dinner, he can get something else without me having to buy it. We will be in our first ever balcony, and are very excited to see what that is like. I wonder if it's worth it, and thinking probably not. But it seemed like it at the time we booked I guess.

When we are back I will have to think about getting another referral. Though I guess I will have some time since so many doctor's offices close down over the holidays. I just keep getting older. Honestly, I don't see it. It's very strange. I guess I always thought I would know that suddenly I am "old". But I still feel the same as I did in my 20's, except now I have a child and have to be the grown up all the time. Which honestly isn't always that fun.

I guess I need to make the decision and stick with it. I mean I have made the decision multiple times, flip flopping back and forth, and it never sticks. I need it to make sense, be logical, be what feels right, and be undeniable. Then perhaps I can stop wondering, and move on. One way or the other.

A 7-year-old

My baby is 7! It's crazy and he's not a little boy any more. Well he is but he's not. He had a great birthday party at the local pool, him and 7 of his little friends. The pool part was great. There were two lifeguards in the pool with the kids, and they had a lot of fun playing games, jumping off the diving board, using the obstacle course. Then it was an hour in the party room. Which made me very thankful that one of the dads had stayed. Eight boys was a little much for me. They ate snacks and took turns getting dressed. One of the boys pulled the emergency alarm in the bathroom. So that was fun. We ate cake, though getting the boys to sing was difficult. And then Jackson opened his gifts, and boom the party was over. I was relieved, it was done! Phew! Fun times but stressful for me.

Winter has arrived in full force. I am at home today because I just can't face the drive in. I hate winter, snow, all of it! When I retired I am moving south. No one seems to believe me but I am looking at options that are good for ex-pats. So far Belize is the top of the list, party because they speak English, and are a former commonwealth country. Also on the list are Costa Rica, Panama and Equador.

Given the terrible weather lately, well it's not really terrible, it's just regular winter. But in any case it has pushed me to book a cruise. For January 15th. Like a month away! I can't wait. Jackson is excited but scared to fly. We'll be doing a 6-night cruise, and one night pre-cruise since we like to fly in early. Hate to miss the boat! The cruise has 3 ports, which are all new to us, and two sea days. Jackson is looking forward to trying the rock climbing again, and going ice skating. Since you know, we don't do that here! Silly kid. I booked a guaranteed cabin so we won't get it assigned for awhile. We got early dining. And I've already booked one excursion. One port we'll take a cab to the beach, and the other one I'm debating which all inclusive to book at, Can't wait! I really don't like winter, snow, cold... ugh!!

My doctor has increased my thyroid medicine by a bit, to bring my numbers down a little more in case I do want to go ahead with trying again. I haven't gone for the blood work yet. My cycle has been incredibly messed up. And I am very unsure of what to do. I think perhaps I am done at one. As much as I would like another baby, I do not look forward to the work, the lost sleep, the extra expenses. Money is a big part of it. I am almost done with all daycare. The savings would be great, and perhaps worth an extra trip every year.

Work has been going well. I am working on a big project with a lot of responsibility. I am enjoying it, though it feels like a big much at times, and I wonder about people. I have some time off at Christmas, and I am looking forward to that. I would like some time to myself to figure things out, decide what I want. In order to advance at work I need to learn French, I've been taking part time classes at work. I do feel that in order to really learn I will need full time training, which can take a year. The problem when doing the training is that you can't take vacation, it's quite far a commute, and it's very intensive. I am not sure I'm quite ready to do it. I will continue what I'm doing and hope to do it later I guess.

Christmas is coming. I am mostly done shopping, just need to get stocking stuffers. And something for my parents which has to be mailed soon. I should be able to go Wednesday or next weekend at the latest. Our tree is up. The Elf has so far remembered to move on a daily basis, though I am not as exciting as many families in being creative on what to do with it. Ours changes shelves and location. That's it. But we are boring like that any way!

A 6th Birthday Party

Today we had Jackson's birthday party. We went back to Gym Tale as we have the past two years, and it was fun as always. They do a good party but I suspect this is the last time we'll be able to go there. The boys were a bit overwhelming. I am very glad the party was not at the house! There were 6 boys total, The party was supposed to be for 8, including the birthday boy, but we had two reply they couldn't come and two others who never replied. So 5 other kids and my own. My goodness they were active! There is a big play structure and they had 30 minutes to run around first. They were all sweaty and red faced by the end of that time. Then an obstacle course, ending with a ball fight against a monster. And after that the party room for pizza and cake. We didn't open the gifts there, but brought them home instead. He got a few good things! Some lego, dinosaur stuff, all things he will enjoy for sure.

His actual birthday is not until the 9th. We will head out for dinner that night. My parent's sent him a restaurant gift card so the meal is on him :-)  The day after he has a dentist appointment to get two cavities filled. Poor kid with his teeth. He is so good at the dentist though, he's had a checkup with temporary fillings put in, and a cleaning. He is much better about brushing after the checkup too. Hopefully no more cavities!

Things are going pretty well. He is doing well at school, he can read! It is a little bit weird to me. There have been some issues with his emotions, he is a very sensitive kid and kids are mean. So he gets teased and called a cry baby by some. We talk about it. I feel bad, since I am the same way. But of course I am a girl. We work on that, and on him not caring what other people think of him, or the things he likes. We write in an I Like Book every night, one thing I like about him and one thing he likes about himself. He also likes to put in one thing he likes about me. We have only just started but I think it will help. I hope it will any way.

Christmas is coming. We put the tree up today but will decorate it tomorrow. I wanted to give the cats a chance to get used to it, and see if they are going to try and knock it over! Especially Kit Kat who is a bit of a hooligan! The other two should be used to it of course. It is lit up, and looks lovely just like that, but we'll add some unbreakable ornaments to it tomorrow.

Next weekend we will go to a Christmas party and he'll sit with Santa. Do all that stuff. It will be fun, and we'll enjoy it. We didn't write a letter, again, I don't think we ever have. He isn't interested. We do have a darn elf on a shelf... I have remembered to move the silly thing every night so far, So far so good any way. He also has a toy advent calendar, which he loves. Though he is having a hard time waiting each day to open a box. Patience is not one of his best virtues. But he is a good kid, and he is my boy.

Happy 5th Birthday

Five years ago today I was in the hospital with a little baby boy newly in my arms. He was then, and is now, so much the love of my life. I never imagined when I had him that a person could love someone so much. 

Today we went to celebrate his birthday at one of his favourite restaurants. I'm happy because kids eat free on their birthday so his yummy rib dinner was free, and he loved it.

After dinner we came home and skype'd nanny & poppy so they could sing, and Jackson opened his presents while we watched. He loves his new monster treads, a bunch of John Deere tractors. I also got him some new clothes, 3 pairs of pj's and a few tops, along with a new sweater. He is currently in the pair or pajamas with feet, he loves them :-) The other two pairs have dinosaurs on them which I am sure he will love as well. And it means his spiderman pj's can be either washed more often or at least not worn every night, and most of the weekend. He refuses to get dressed on the weekend unless we are leaving the house.

How is it possible that my little baby is so big and grown up now? 

Bad luck and Birthday Party Excitement

Today was Jackson's 5th birthday party. I booked the same place I took him last year. He invited 7 little boys but only 6 came, it was still a lot of fun. And he got some nice gifts. I think everyone had a good time. It is funny that because he is in a split kindergarten class he is with kids much younger, and others a bit older than him. He turns 5 but had at least 3 of his friends who are just turned 4. At that age I guess it doesn't matter too much. The theme was dinosaurs, and my sister did a fabulous cake for the party.

Awesome dino cake!

The kids got to run and play, they were all red faced and tired by the end of the party. I think it was a great deal, perhaps we will be back again next year! The girl who did his party last year was there working and remembered us, which was nice. She didn't do his party though. 

The place has a play area, so you can bring your kid and let them play. It's a little costly for how long, and without a friend to go too it isn't as much fun. They do a "Kids night out" as well, which is really reasonable, $15 for 3 hours, drop the kids off at 6 pm, pick up at 9 pm and they play, have a snack and watch a movie. Jackson did it once but was very shy and quiet and it was hard to drop him off. He has now asked to go again though. So perhaps there are some nights out in my future! Or even nights in... drop him off and have 3 hours to myself, what would I do???

The bad luck bit is because of the morning. We went to get some groceries and a toy for the angel tree at school. Then stopped at the library to pick up a book I had on hold. Finally were going to pick up our passports from the post office but it didn't open until 11 and it was 10:30, so we started for home. Turning right onto a busy street, with a yield sign, light in my direction would have been red, and I stopped because a car was going kind of fast, I would have cut them off, or been hit, so I stopped. Well the lady behind me didn't so CRASH! I've had my car since the end of July. Seriously. It now has a big crack in the bumper, and I had the fun of dealing with all of that on birthday party day... I called my insurance as soon as we got home, because I was hit from behind I'm not at fault so won't have to pay the deductible. All in all it was really annoying though. Had to go way out to the police station and the lady police officer was rather rude at first, I was getting upset. She kept telling me I hadn't gotten enough information, but the 911 operator had taken it all down and I didn't have a pen or paper in the car. She eventually softened up a bit when I mentioned we'd been on the way to my son's birthday party. And then she found out the other lady had already been in to report it... so phew! Any way. Now to take the car in for an estimate (ugh) and then get it fixed, deal with a rental (thankfully covered!) and yeah... 

My neck, the back of my head hurts, is a bit sore. I've taken some ibuprofen, it seems to help but I think I'll go to the doctor on Monday just in case. We'll see if I feel better before then. I'm sure I'm fine, but I'd rather be safe than sorry! Jackson is fine, he swears nothing hurts, he is ok. He was in his booster seat, which I think I should replace? But I'm not sure. I mean the other lady's car wasn't even damaged, mine is fairly minor. No airbags were deployed or anything. I am waiting to talk to the insurance adjuster and see. Obviously if they cover the expense I will get him a new one. 

The irony of the car accident is we had one about 2 and a half years ago, a few months after I had gotten my car in 2012. We've had this car only a few months as well. I think perhaps I won't ever get a new car again! At least we are both ok, the car is drive-able, and it will all be sorted out. I'm getting to be a pro at this! I do wish people would notice that I'm there, and not moving, and you know, stop.

Loose Tooth!!

My baby has a loose tooth. It's the first one he got at 16 weeks. I remember when he got it. Now it's getting ready to fall out. My little boy is growing up! He is quite freaked out about it. I know he sort of understands, and we talked about how everyone loses their baby teeth and get new grown up teeth. I wasn't expecting it so early, I thought maybe when he's 6. He turns 5 in a few weeks but this seems early! I am reading that it's not, and that when kids get their teeth early, they lose them early too. He has also been complaining about something sore in the back, which can apparently be the 6 year molars. Though it was also when he had his virus, so could have been that. Having read up on it I am a little more calm, I was calm in front of him but a little concerned too! I thought the top ones fall out first but I was wrong, so that's a good thing since it's the one on the bottom that wiggles. He complained it hurt, I had to ask him multiple times if someone hit him or he fell or something, he says no, though he did tell me some story about his friend punching him in the face. Which I'm pretty sure was just a story since it happened "a while ago or maybe yesterday". Either way, I have to get tooth fairy ready! Oh my.

Otherwise he is feeling much better after the virus, and eating like normal, though I guess he'll be wanting softer foods for a bit now. We have his birthday party planned, my sister will make the dinosaur cake again. And we've sent the invitations home already. Early I know but I wanted people to have time to plan since it's so close to Christmas. I just hope that people will RSVP even if they are not coming, so we can perhaps invite someone else. The party is at a gym tale, and is for 8 children including the birthday boy, so we sent 7 invites, I had to talk him into all boys. I find it strange that boys will invite girls to their parties but girls never invite the boys! So I put my foot down, and told him to pick boys. Mean? Perhaps. And my boy does have a lot of girlfriends. Occasionally he says one is his girlfriend and he is going to marry her. Then they get in a fight and he decides that marrying me is a better idea. I'm sure he'll grow out of that though! I have tried to explain but he gets upset so I leave it for now :-)

Tomorrow is my last day at my current job, I am returning to my old team, but a new workflow. So I will be doing reports and stats, it should be more my speed. I hope. We'll see how long it lasts I guess. At least I have the opportunity to try new positions to find what works for me, what I am happy doing. I have not been happy, been stressed. I am working on those things. I am trying to cut out coffee (that's hard!) and so far am down to half a cup a day instead of two cups. I am sure I'll be at none by the weekend, then to cut the tea every so often. I am also going to bed earlier. Aiming for before 9 because 10 wasn't working for me. I still wake up tired, and wish I could sleep for days, but I hope it gets better soon. Sugar is the other thing to go, I'm working on that but it's hard! Sugar is in everything, and it's so yummy :-)  I will get there, hopefully sooner than later. Perhaps the holidays are not the best time to start?

And speaking of holidays, we are working on a list for Santa. Jackson would like a BIG train set. He currently has a figure 8 wooden set, which is great but doesn't offer many extras. So I plan to get him some add ons for it. I have debated a table and may still get him one. It would be nice for him to play at, but it's expensive and I didn't want to spend that much this year. He also wants a garbage truck and log truck, the ones he picked are about $60 each, so that isn't happening. My parents will find something along those lines for him, and of course there will be stocking stuffers, a board game of some sort and a paid of PJ's to open Christmas Eve. For myself, I want something so I can watch Netflix if I choose to get it. Something to be able to connect wirelessly to the internet and stream. We'll see about that I guess!

Poor sick kiddo

Life has been interesting lately. Things are going ok for the most part. I have been very unhappy in my job but that is at a point where it's changing. I was supposed to talk to my boss about it today but instead was at home taking kiddo to the doctor. He had a fever Tuesday night and yesterday we were home, he complained still this morning though his fever was gone. I tried to get him to go to school but he said he was too sick. Now we will be home tomorrow as well. He apparently has hand foot and mouth disease. Though he only has sores in his mouth. Which makes it very hard for him to eat or drink anything. He has had quite a bit of yogurt today, is obviously hungry but everything he tries makes him cry. Except yogurt. I even made him a milkshake but he said that hurt too. I'm at a loss, and sad for him. He missed his last swimming lesson tonight.  I will be missing 3 days of work and only have two days of family leave left to use. So I don't know how that will work, never heard back from my boss today. But what bothers me most is my poor kid who is so sick, and sore. I have been giving him tylenol and advil to help with the pain, but it's hard for him to even get those down. So what do I do! Poor kid.

He had a good Halloween, lots of candy, and lots of fun handing stuff out too. He was a dinosaur at school and for trick or treating. My niece took him around to get candy. He really enjoyed it, and was at a great age to do it, everything was enjoyable and fun. He really is at a good age for a lot of things. I can't wait for his birthday party. We have it booked at A Gym Tale again, he will have to choose 7 friends to invite. It is a fun party, and super easy for  me. Just have the kids show up, bring a cake. Easy. No clean up, and they even provide food.

The toy catalogs are coming out, and of course he wants everything in them. It's pretty funny really, of course he's not getting them all. I am going to have to get him to narrow it down to only two or three things that he wants. He really has too many toys as it is. And with our big Disney trip in the planning (and being paid for) stage, I don't want to spend too much on the holidays.

My plans for a Disney cruise have changed to a just Disney vacation. We'll be there for 9 night, at Animal Kingdom Lodge in a standard room. I have 6 days at the parks planned, with some fancy character meals in there, and two days off to do other things and relax. I have booked one meal for my birthday that I know he won't be happy about, but hopefully he'll get over it.

And when we get back I am thinking of getting a referral to the fertility clinic, just to see what my odds are. Since I'll have turned 40 I'm sure they won't be that great, but who knows. I am taking a few things that are supposed to help, and working on the weight/health thing. Not going well, that weight loss bit. I am hopeful that I will be able to do it though. If I could just focus and keep on track.

And now I'm going to go to bed, since I have kiddo all day tomorrow as well, I could stay up a bit later. But I'm tired, and it's going to be a long long weekend. Without a lot of the stuff I wanted to do. Fingers crossed he's able to eat something.

Fourth Birthday Party

Today we had Jackson's 4th birthday party. He really enjoyed it, as did all of his friends. We went to a local play gym, Gym Tale, and they run a good party. It was 2 hours long, the first half hour was play time on the structure, then 30 minutes of structured play, and finally an hour in the party room with pizza and the cake. We invited 10 friends but only 8 were able to come. Two were his best friends at his old daycare and he was very happy to see them again. The rest were from the new school & daycare, some from his class and some from only daycare. There were only 2 girls, though 4 were invited. The party was a lot of fun, very well run, and I think well worth the cost.

The structured play involved first an obstacle course, with a trampoline, a climbing wall, slide, and some tunnels. Then there was a "battle" against the bad guy Dr Blue. Dr Blue was one of the employees dressed up in a special suit and the kids all threw balls at him until he was "killed".  I was a little surprised that the kids were so willing and quick to get into it.  Two were scared and cried, not surprised. Jackson was actually scared as well but did manage to get into it.

The kids fighting Dr Blue

After all the play time there was some colouring and then some pizza.  The kids all ate pretty well, some faster and better than others of course. Finally it was time for the cake. My sister made a dinosaur cake, it turned out really well and Jackson loved it. It is a layer of vanilla and a layer of chocolate inside. The dinosaur is made from rice crispie squares, but we didn't eat that part.

Dinosaur cake! Rawr!!

Happy Birthday Boy after the candles

Because eating and cake didn't take as long, they kids got an extra 10 minutes to go play on the structure before it was time for pictures on the couch. It was hard to get a good picture!  This is the best shot, with most of the kids looking ahead.  

Sachi, James, Jack, Aidan, Nolan, & Jackson
Elisa, Julianna & Owen

We didn't have time to open presents there so brought them all home to open. Jackson was of course thrilled with everything. Especially the Play Doh garbage truck. You know, the one he asked Santa for that I have upstairs in the closet.  Looks like we are doing an angel tree kid at work.

All in all, it was a great party and well worth the cost. I didn't have to do any cleaning up or preparing, just made loot bags, my sister made a cake, and voila! Instant party.  I did give Jackson the option of a "ninja" party, at a local martial arts place or the place he chose.  We'll see what next year brings!  They do offer encounters with a princess or super hero. But I thought the party was enough, no need for Spiderman this year at least!  Now I hope he's invited to some parties himself, most of the parents just dropped off their kids, which would be kind of nice.